Ask and it will happen

After the debacle that was 2010, Christian and I are beginning to breathe more easily. However, I still seem to be expecting disasters (or not really disasters, but you know - things that are not particularly great!). The old adrenaline levels are probably higher than they need to be, and the little furrow between my eyebrows is not yet lessening as it should be. So quite simply, I decided to do something about this constant expectation of stress.

When I was in the city with Gertrude the other week, we were browsing in a book shop and I found a little box called "Ask and It Will Happen". It's a little green book and some tarot cards in a cute box, and the idea is that you think of something that you really want or need, and draw a card from the pack. If you apply the advice from your chosen card to your everyday thoughts and actions, your wish / need / want will come to you. Sound hippy and trippy and kooky?? Absolutely. I loved it.

Basically, the premise is that if you put good vibes and thoughts out into the universe, good things will come back to you. If you really want something badly enough, and put energy into asking for it in a positive manner, anything is possible - so I suppose in some ways it's like praying for agnostics!? Anyhow, dippy hippy things aside, I thought hard (and wished for some form of income in 2011 that would let me stay at home with the kids), shuffled the tarot cards, and drew. Now obviously, a part-time teaching position at a nice school within commuting distance did not jump out of the cards at me. Hardy ha ha. But I did get a card telling me to put my family and love first, and that money should come lower down my list of priorities. If I put the needs of my family and myself first, then any financial worries that I had would be taken care of. I read the card and decided to focus on being a good stay-at-home mum, and reducing our costs at home. If I could tweak the budget just a tiny bit more, and if we only spent money on the absolute essentials, then perhaps we would be ok.

I am not pulling your leg - that very same day I received two phone calls out of the blue: one asking me if I would tutor a high school student, and the other asking if I would consider cleaning houses. With just these two jobs, I will be able to contribute just under half of our weekly grocery bill, or pay for our nappies and petrol. Not only that, but we will have no before- or after-school care fees for Jack, as I will do the school run on time every day, we will have no daycare fees for the two girls, and I will be at home with my babies, which is what I wished for. No joke - I was stunned.

Regardless of whether or not the cards are magic, I loved the way they made me think about what is important. Just flipping through them, there are cards about being grateful, being kind to yourself, challenging youself to try new things. All sorts of lovely inspirational words, all about sending positive vibes into the universe. So without giving you all my secrets, here are a few things I have been grateful for today:

* The spontaneous kiss that I received from Maisie this morning, when she was snuggling on my lap watching Dora. The Mouse cuddles a lot, but bestows kisses rarely...but this morning she twisted around, planted a wet one on my cheek, and turned back around to dance along with Boots. Be still my beating heart!

* The love between Jack and Phoebe that was so apparent in the car park at Chadstone today. They were walking behind me and the pram, holding hands. They were having one of the funny conversations that very young children have, about who was their family. Phoebe asked Jack if Mummy and Daddy were her family, and he replied, "No. They're the mummy and daddy. They're in charge. I'm your family, because I'm your brudder. But we all love you." Skewed logic and all, I thought he was very cute!

* The feeling I had last night, standing next to my husband at a small drinks function with his new colleagues. He was so happy and relaxed in the company of these people, I know he will love his new school. After what he endured last year, he deserves to enjoy his job, have time to enjoy his children and simply be happy.

Right now, I am grateful for some excellent telly - the womens' final in the Australian Open. It's looking like it will be a great match! I am also grateful that the basket of unfolded washing is behind me where I can't see it...and that my husband has already done the dishes...and that I am already in my jarmie pants. Now there's a visual you most likely are NOT grateful for!!!!